☆ FAIRY LIGHTS & STARDUST

A superstar’s birthday → “Because of you, I can be who I am today.”

I don’t know where to start with you, and honestly, I feel like this edit/gif isn’t good enough. You’ve done so much for me, and I’m going to babble on about it, but all I can see you doing right now, if you ever read and understood this, is waving it off and telling me to stop being stupid. The truth of the matter is that you mean so much to me, more than an idol or a star or a brother or a close friend. I don’t know exactly what to call you, or how to explain my (platonic) love for you. I mean, you’d probably find it creepy since I don’t actually know you, but from what I’ve seen onstage and backstage, through interviews and twitter, I’ve grown to adore. Yes, even that immature, blunt, idiotic side that tells brats to shut the fuck up (which made me want to hug you).

You’re an idiot, one of the biggest ones I know, and I’ve watched you grow into the person you are today. I remember when you were first very shy, and slowly, you became this arrogant asshole the settled into a dumbass of subtle douchebagery and I’ve seen how far you’ve come. Somewhere along the lines, I noticed the change — you seemed to have lost your way, but you’re content with your life now, aren’t you? You’ve had these doubts plenty of times when looking at the band, but I’m really happy you decided to stay. I know what was going on through your head when you were trying to decide whether you should leave the band: nothing last forever, right? You didn’t want it to end on any bad notes, you want to keep them as friends for the rest of your lives than stop talking over some stupid argument. I’ve always had that connection to you…when I was suddenly depressed, so were you. When I got motivation to turn my life around and be optimistic, you stated on twitter that you were doing the same thing and you were going to work hard to show fans and your bandmates just how much worth you have.

I guess this is a very personal birthday wish that will get deleted by some toe-sucking tumblr user that only wants the graphics on their blog, but whatever. This is just my lame way of saying thank you for being who you are and for giving me strength when I was broken and defeated. Thank you for making me laugh when I had forgotten how to, and making me smile when I was too blinded by anger to see anything else. You’re more than just a guitarist in a band, Mr. Superstar. You’re my favorite person and I hope one day, I can be just as awesome and bright as you are.

Happy 34h birthday, Aoi — may all your wishes come true.